Thoughts

I find myself disgusted at liking men. Though there was once desire, but I find men disgusting, not trustworthy, even more so at the wishy-washy and cowardice characteristics.

Disgusted at the ways they look at things, their perception. Disgusted at men who only look upon their beloved and despise the rest as if they are not human beings.

I'd rather like a handsome lady at least we sync....

I am also disgusted with myself for being anal about what I want. What have I do e for what I want to do besides praying in the past? It's shit!!

What?! Pray and trust God? Why has no one taught the practical ways till it was too late?

So don't talk to me about praying, trust God and have faith. Coz things don't just happen by doing these.

Where are the practical actions??

Maybe I am the one who interpret wrongly, that's why I ended up destroying myself... Robbing myself of my dreams... And desires...

I hate the fact that I have to let go because I have lost the desire or dream. Because it's all over, I lost and I surrender.

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