Sisters' Fellowship
Had a wonderful night on Friday evening at Makansutra and watching Pirates of the Carribbeans on Saturday morning, 1230am! Managed to get my brother to join us as well. He needs to catch on some fire from passionate and on-fire christians.
The food at Makansutra really tastes delicious.
It was an evening of divine appointments as well. Met 2 sec sch friends - one on the train and the other at Makansutra. :> Managed to get the contact of the latter.
Then saw my ex-churchmate as well with his cg members. He's now working for Singapore Associate of Mental Health - a psychologist.
Then saw many members pver there as well, fellowshipping.
Managed to get Baoping at the eleventh-minute - She got saved today! Praise the Lord!
Reached home at about 4am - thank God for my brother coz he rides a bike. Most of the gals reached home about 5+ in the morning.
Slept till 1pm and had to drag my feet to ECP coz I promised Baoping to get go cycling with her. I haven't been to ECP for a long time. It was a great time cycling with the amateur. She just learnt how to cycle but was a great courage for her to cycle pass so many pedestrains (rather roller bladers). I bumped into some bushes and end up with some bruises on my knee. I was looking out for her, because I was cycling faster and made a turn. Couldn't see her and I was worried she missed me. Overconfident in my skills I guess.. haha...
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I have been spiritually dry. I have lost my vision and my dream and this happens so many a times, that I am so tired myself.
I question myself for the past few days, do I love God? Maybe but not to the extend to give up my life for Him I guess. I am selfish and self-centred. I want my life to be the way I want it be. Maybe that's the reason why I struggle so very often for being an idealist!
I have been asking God to change my perception, the way I look at things or perceive situations and circumstances.
Many times, I asked questions innocently and got rebuked. Why? Because those were questions which adults will not ask or seemingly too ignorant for an adult to ask. Sigh....
I haven't been exposed to the real world since Sec Sch. I was very low profile in poly and besides projects, I literally hide at home. When I graduated from poly, I literally kept myself away from pple. Those pple surrounding me are usually pple from church.
I tore myself away from the world except from church. Subsconsciously I could have withdrawn because I didn't want to face the real world. Maybe that's why my puny little brain is still stucked where it was in my adolescent years.
I am struggling too. I want to grow up but somehow I felt I am way too far behind. Far, far behind. I don't know how to catch up nor do I know to change this. I am frustrated that I am stuck too.
But honestly, I wasn't exposed to much of this world except to workplace, church and family. I didn't make friends after poly. Or rather after sec sch. Those pple who I call friends after Sec Sch are acquaintances, we were never close. So if you really talk about conflicts, I didn't face much unless it's with leaders.
So what do I do now from where I am? I don't know. I am lost. I am worried. I am fearful of being behind from my peers in terms of mindset/perceptions/maturity.
it's not that I don't want to grow up, I don't know how to........:'(
The food at Makansutra really tastes delicious.
It was an evening of divine appointments as well. Met 2 sec sch friends - one on the train and the other at Makansutra. :> Managed to get the contact of the latter.
Then saw my ex-churchmate as well with his cg members. He's now working for Singapore Associate of Mental Health - a psychologist.
Then saw many members pver there as well, fellowshipping.
Managed to get Baoping at the eleventh-minute - She got saved today! Praise the Lord!
Reached home at about 4am - thank God for my brother coz he rides a bike. Most of the gals reached home about 5+ in the morning.
Slept till 1pm and had to drag my feet to ECP coz I promised Baoping to get go cycling with her. I haven't been to ECP for a long time. It was a great time cycling with the amateur. She just learnt how to cycle but was a great courage for her to cycle pass so many pedestrains (rather roller bladers). I bumped into some bushes and end up with some bruises on my knee. I was looking out for her, because I was cycling faster and made a turn. Couldn't see her and I was worried she missed me. Overconfident in my skills I guess.. haha...
--------------------------------------------------------------
I have been spiritually dry. I have lost my vision and my dream and this happens so many a times, that I am so tired myself.
I question myself for the past few days, do I love God? Maybe but not to the extend to give up my life for Him I guess. I am selfish and self-centred. I want my life to be the way I want it be. Maybe that's the reason why I struggle so very often for being an idealist!
I have been asking God to change my perception, the way I look at things or perceive situations and circumstances.
Many times, I asked questions innocently and got rebuked. Why? Because those were questions which adults will not ask or seemingly too ignorant for an adult to ask. Sigh....
I haven't been exposed to the real world since Sec Sch. I was very low profile in poly and besides projects, I literally hide at home. When I graduated from poly, I literally kept myself away from pple. Those pple surrounding me are usually pple from church.
I tore myself away from the world except from church. Subsconsciously I could have withdrawn because I didn't want to face the real world. Maybe that's why my puny little brain is still stucked where it was in my adolescent years.
I am struggling too. I want to grow up but somehow I felt I am way too far behind. Far, far behind. I don't know how to catch up nor do I know to change this. I am frustrated that I am stuck too.
But honestly, I wasn't exposed to much of this world except to workplace, church and family. I didn't make friends after poly. Or rather after sec sch. Those pple who I call friends after Sec Sch are acquaintances, we were never close. So if you really talk about conflicts, I didn't face much unless it's with leaders.
So what do I do now from where I am? I don't know. I am lost. I am worried. I am fearful of being behind from my peers in terms of mindset/perceptions/maturity.
it's not that I don't want to grow up, I don't know how to........:'(
